Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I understand how hurricane paths work

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

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authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I have a reading level above third grade

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

Why do most people care so much about what others think? Are they afraid of society norms?

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I see through liars

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

Why do people mourn when their leaders lose elections? Is it common for people to cry over events that are out of their control?

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

Est dolore nobis praesentium dicta voluptas aut.

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

With its stock in sharp decline, Trump's media company will buy $400 million of its own shares - AP News

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

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I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

What are some hard rock or heavy metal bands that are overrated?

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

Can trans people tell me what the criteria for a woman is excluding self identification (facts do not rely on self belief)?

I know who the president of Turkey really is

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

NASA Science Community Budget Meeting POSTPONED - NASA Watch

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I don’t buy bullshit

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

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I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

Do you like wearing short skirts?

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I can read

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I have complete contempt for fakery

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I don’t cotton to rapists

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I can count

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I actually pay taxes

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes